Is casual hook up a good idea when in a relationship?

This question can have varied answers depending on your relationship status, your personality, your life and many other things. The other way of answering whether having a casual hook up is a good idea or not especially when you are in a relationship is to say that it can vary from person to person.

So what actually is a casual hook up? A casual hook up is when you would like to bang someone often but without any strings attached and without any feelings? Generally you casually hook up with just one person but there are no emotional connections there. It is just a liberating and a relaxing experience for both the parties where they enjoy doing something out of the normal and take pleasure in such doings.

Some people think that a casual hook up is the same as friends with benefit. But the more important thing to understand is that ‘friends with benefits’ is a concept that does not exist in real life. Well, some people think it does, but then everyone has the right to live in their own little fantasy world. It was a myth that was started by Hollywood and it is sad, people started taking it way too seriously.

A politer way of explaining what a casual hook up is to say it is about two people (same sex or opposite sex) currently on Tinder, in sex, on social media, on booty calls and drunk weekends. Is it restricted t only the weekends? Not really – it can depend on how often and frequently the two people like to hook up!

When in a relationship, sometimes a casual hook up can be a good thing and sometimes not so good. Let us look at some things that can make your casual hook up a sensible and a smart decision when in a relationship or not.

Imagine a relationship where it is just a matter of two people living under one roof but as separate human beings. There is absolutely no love, no care, no trust, no faith and no mutual understanding of one another. You technically may still be in a relationship but more so for your extended family, your friends and the society around you and not so much for your own inner self. Where and how do you find solace then? This is where many people have gone out to explore the idea of a casual hook up to find some happiness and peace in their lives, of course without any strings attached. Even researchers have claimed that a casual hook up can act as a medicine in such cases and help people get better control of their lives to bring happiness and contentment back.

Let us think about it ourselves. When you enter a relationship, you imagine your other half to contribute to everything in your life – your family, your decisions, your home, your social life, your trust and your happiness. When you start finding such things are missing from your relationship, what you prefer is to have a casual hook up where it is all about pleasure without any strings attached. Fair enough! Why would to end a relationship to start another relationship that can potentially leave you feeling shitty in some years.

A casual hook up is meant just for you. They are not supposed to meet your friends, attend social events with you, visit your family and wander with you. They are meant to be your secret partners for as long as you two agree for. People do say, there is one part of you that you live just for your own self – may be that is when people did not know they were indirectly defining a casual hook up too!

Now let us look at a scenario where you are in a very healthy and a successful relationship with your partner. It is giving you everything you wanted from a perfect life – a florishing family, a happy life, a great support system, someone to listen to and be heard from, someone to discuss your finances with, someone you can blindly trust and someone you can call your soul mate in every sense of the word. How does a casual hook up fit in this case? Does it remain a good thing? I would not call it such a good thing in this case. It will simply be cheating on your loyal and faithful partner for no reason.

Well, let me explain. There has to be a reason why you would skip out of a successful and perfect relationship to enter the world of a casual hook up. And it better be a very solid reason as cheating on an ideal relationship calls for a damn big thing. I would say in this case, a person is either not in the right senses to make sensible decisions or is affected by a work mate or a friend who is showing them the wrong path to casual hook up. Again, what is worth remembering is that if your work mate or a friend or even an acquaintance is into a casual hook up, you cannot get influenced by their lives because what may seem like a happy story could be hiding a dark, dirty secret that that may be experiencing in their relationship.

What is important to understand is that every relationship is different as there is a different level of understanding, trust, love, etc. between two people in a relationship. So what could be one’s reason to start a casual hook up even when in a relationship does not give another person any room to go on the path of a casual hook up as their relationship rapport could be on a completely different tangent.

And this is where all the difference lies – whether having a casual hook up while in a relationship is a good thing or not so good a thing. There is no right or wrong here. If you are reading this because you cannot decide if a casual hook up is right for you or not, we will advise you to start reviewing your relationship status with your partner and see where you sit in terms of love, sex, understanding, sharing, trust and faith and once you get a clear picture on your relationship, your question on whether to start a casual hook up or not will be answered by default. And whatever your answer will be, you will be content that you have weighed both the pros and cons of a casual hook up against your relationship and have made the right decision for yourself.

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